I had to fight my way through this week because I was TIRED. And grumpy. I'm sure that part of it was because of the trip to California; it's not very relaxing to travel and I never sleep well away from home. Does that make me OLD? You would think that with two half days for conferences(evening ones at the secondary level last night), I would be relaxed, but I'm all about teaching, and March used to be the best month for that. Now it's filled with half days and state tests, which are late start for students who don't need to take them. (disruptive to those of us who are actually trying to teach our curriculum, especially the departments who get evaluated on how well our students do)Could we have a BIT MORE CONTROL THEN? In addition to being out late last night, although I did enjoy socializing with my fellow colleagues and chatting with the few parents who came, one of my close friends is losing her mother to lung cancer and another one(a former friend who disappeared when Patt got sick)is in the hospital with blood clots in her leg and lungs.
We drifted away from one another because she lost a bunch of weight, dumped her husband and found a cooler set of friends, who liked to party while I am more about coffee and books, but I still care about her. We made many wonderful memories together at gymnastics meets, obviously! Life is a slog right now; even approaching spring(today was 60 and sunny!) is bittersweet because it was Mr. Stargazer's favorite time of year. Letting him go, when he was so sick and needed to die, was the most difficult thing I've ever done. I still miss him every day, although I don't cry as much, nor do I deny reality. I can't describe how awful and unreal it was to see him fade away, so I relate too much to my friend's painful journey with her mom. However, there was this: