Stargazer

Light and Shadow

We've come to that time of year when we're losing the light. Because we live in that space between day and night, we'll be further constricted by the limitations of the pandemic, which is (once again) becoming terrifying pervasive everywhere. Déjà vu, unfortunately. :( 

I'm grateful for long time friends with outdoor covered decks where we can catch up face to face. It almost felt normal, except for the masks and lack of hugs. 

We've been close for so long that when one of our group shared that her breast cancer was back after 20 years, and that each one of her four doctors had exclaimed about her last bout with it, "You had THAT kind of breast cancer? And you're alive? You shouldn't have survived that!" we laughed, after first saying, "Oh, SH*T!" Thankfully, our dear friend has a different and much more treatable type of breast cancer this time. Whew.

The waning light and increasing cold create beautiful colors and shadows on my neighborhood trees. 

Here is the view to the east on this road less traveled. It's generally a quiet street, and is on both my running and walking routes. To the south (right) is the development where I live. It looks like the country, but it's actually the suburbs! Due to my get together with my fellow Ram World Language teachers, I walked later than normal today, so I saw the beginnings of the sunset. Those moments when day slips into night are spectacular!

As we move into holiday time, I have several huge decisions to make. Will I hand out my Halloween candy on the 31st? Where will I celebrate Thanksgiving, and how will I protect myself while not hurting my family's feelings? Is that even possible? Should I go east for Christmas which entails another quarantine, a COVID test, and a lot of time away from home and my parents? Since Covid 19 is raging everywhere, should I take that risk? Sadly, I have more questions than answers right now.  

 

 

 

Every day is an adventure

My grandson was wearing a onesie today with that message, and I have to say that I admire the optimistic quote. However, the definition of adventure is this: "engage in hazardous and exciting activity, especially the exploration of unknown territory."

I think my expression will look a lot like Grandson's for the next few months. Perhaps for even longer! We'll see what happens on November 3rd and afterward. As for the exploration of unknown territory, I made the Anzac biscuits, and they were a flop. They're edible, but a disappointment. That's the risk you take when you venture out and try new things. Sigh.

The Golden syrup was a beautiful color, although extremely thick. It took another spoon and some aerobics to get it off the measuring spoon. 

The coolest part of the recipe was adding the baking soda/boiling water to the butter and Golden syrup mix, which then foamed up and changed consistency. I felt like I was back in high school chemistry.

I double checked my ingredients 100 several times, but the batter still looked wrong!

And the biscuits(cookies) taste like flat oatmeal/coconut macaroons, as well as looking like they were made by a 5 year old. Sometimes an adventure can be a failure. C'est la vie. 

John got to help paint his granddaughter's bedroom from this brownish mustard to something prettier. I sure wish I lived closer to my grandson! Poor John was foolish enough to get his first shingles shot and a flu shot on the same day, so I'm wondering how his arms and shoulders held up. Ouch. 

Low temperatures (in the 30s) mean that the trees are getting more colorful...

And a brisk walk outside always improves my mood. I was shocked when a strange woman stopped her car in the middle of the road, opened her door, and told me that she loved my jacket. I can't get over how many compliments I get on this neon coat, when it's the worst color in the world on me! At least drivers can't miss me, right? 

 

Chillin'

My accomplishments have been few lately, but I'm not feeling very guilty. I'm retired, and there's a pandemic raging (re-raging?). :( I AM over halfway through the Great Australian Bake Off Season 2. They changed formats, hosts and judges, so I like it much better. It mirrors the British and Canadian versions except that some of the bakers put vegemite in their pastries. This evening they prepared pudding that was more like a steamed cake. I'm so confused. Spotted Dick? (I just became 12 years old, giggle!) I do love those unique Australian vowels, and can mostly understand their accent without subtitles. 

My new calendar came in the mail yesterday. It's been a six year tradition for me to buy this quirky calendar; I originally found it in a cafe in Seward, and I've gotten one ever since. Although I do need to censor the photos sometimes, I enjoy the quotes(don't laugh!), the grit and courage of some of the men, and the dramatic scenery. They have gay Alaskans represented, as well as a few guys with beards down to their waists. They even show older men my age who have survived bear attacks and are definitely not sex symbols.

Do you see what I mean about the meaningful words? Or are you busy wondering what's under my fingers? ;)

Mari was blissfully happy that I turned on the fireplace for the first time this morning. We both relaxed near its warmth since the rest of the house was chilly, and outside cold rain was falling. (snowing in the mountain passes!)

My bibs are supposed to be frost free, but I still put away my hoses, then covered the faucets with these contraptions. Before we had the protectors, my dad used to wrap his hose bib in a pair of his old boxer shorts, and secure it with duct tape. It made me laugh every time I visited! Speaking of Dad, his hips and feet are feeling better after a few days break from exercise. I gently reminded him that he could be taking Ibuprofen for his arthritis pain, which might help a bit. Yesterday Dad was ready to walk again, but his "youngster" (88) former colleague, friend and walking partner had fallen and sprained his ankle. I alternate between worrying myself sick about these guys and admiring their stubbornness persistence! 

The wetter and chillier weather means a return to my putrid (but comfortable) neon yellow coat, and the prospect of many not-so-great hair days in my future. Oy vey. 

 

 

Chill

In a literal sense, our temperatures are dropping into our normal winter range with highs in the 40s and lows in the 30s, which has meant some changes to my routine. Perhaps we'll also start seeing a bit more fall color? Honestly though, we're called "The Evergreen State" for a reason.

I've retired my light jacket for the moment, and brought out my thick and well-made Alaskan sweatshirts. Have you ever been to Homer? If not, try to get there some time. Visit the Salty Dawg Saloon. Go out on the water for a pleasure cruise. Admire the glorious scenery, with impressive mountains everywhere you look. 

The colder weather means that my dianthus will stop blooming. 

This cheery flower will die soon, and will end up in the yard waste bin. It's lived a great life though and was much admired. 

A few trees along my street are turning red/orange. Usually both sides of the road are brightly colored by now. Although they look like the same type of tree, the trees to the south end up orange and the northern ones red. I've never been able to figure it out. 

I love multi-colored leaves. 

I retired three years ago, but have never re-programmed my furnace, thus the heat goes off about 8; on chilly days, it can drop to 60 degrees in my house. Mari is glaring at me because she wants me to turn on the fireplace, which she worships. In the meantime, she'll bask in the sun near the sliding glass door! 

Now that I have all the ingredients, I'll be baking these Anzac biscuits; they'll make a tasty snack with a hot cup of coffee during these colder autumn days. Finally, on a more figurative note, I'm not a very "chill" person (never have been), and have come to accept that no one will ever call me easy going or calm! I'm highly social with a non-chilly aka warm personality. Fortunately, I also enjoy my alone time, as long as there's not TOO much of it. When John invited me over to watch the debate with him tonight, I didn't hesitate to respond: Huh uh, no thanks, not a chance. John is an extremely laid back person; the most he would react during the debate would be to roll his eyes or purse his lips. Yours truly would be the one jumping to her feet and yelling at the television. So, it's best that I "chill" at home with the cat. :)

Miscellany

Today has turned into a surprisingly beautiful day, but I didn't get my lawn mowed. It was probably because I was busy here...

My exciting new discovery was this British goods shop and bakery in my downtown area(about 10 minutes away); unfortunately, they won't get their next shipment of custard powder in until next week. Is everyone making Nanaimo bars? However, it wasn't a wasted trip. 

In order to make my next project (ANZAC biscuits from the Great Australian Bake Off), I needed this unfamiliar product, which has a rather gory illustration on the can. People have been wondering why I’m so entranced with the baking shows, when I barely even cook. I think it has something to do with how fascinating it is to watch the bakers create their visions and dreams(sometimes nightmares!), and how inventive and determined they have to be when things go awry. There is also the power of how kind and mostly helpful they are to their fellow competitors. In today’s world of personal attacks and seemingly constant negativity, it’s heartwarming and comforting. And when events don’t go the way they want, they tend to say how proud they are simply to be there and how happy to have had the opportunity. So, that's why! 

Speaking of creative? Another neighbor has cleverly posed this skeleton on the hill. What is the drawing on their garage door supposed to be though? Apparently, their artwork is a bit too abstract for me! 

This house near my parents has another elaborate Halloween display although I object to them hanging figures in effigy. For personal reasons, I recoil from that kind of decoration. What happened to the cute side of the holiday? Jack o' Lanterns and cartoony witches and ghosts, with a few non-scary vampires thrown in. Oh, and don't forget the black cat! (Mari says)

I didn't need my raincoat today to walk, which was something to celebrate. But sadly, things aren't all sunshine and light. I find myself increasingly concerned about my dad. For many decades he's walked five times a week with a couple friends until recently when his legs, hips and feet started to give him too much trouble. I know that he's very sad to give up his outings and his chats with the guys. A long time voracious reader of history and mysteries, he never asks me to order him books anymore; I don't think he can concentrate well enough to follow complex plots and characters. :( Without explaining why, he now wants my mom to drive most of the time. Dad has seemed like a Superman to me for most of my life although I'm now realizing that he's an increasingly feeble 92 year old with arthritis and gout. However, he's still delighted to look at pictures and videos of his great-grandson who is five months old today. He enjoys reading his "Weekly" magazine with its short and varied articles. He still sneaks candy any chance he gets, to my diabetic mom's disgust. The reality is that old(er) age happens to all of us, or the alternative...

Oddities

You can see that my calendar is packed this week, right? I feel extremely lazy (and guilty) with so many friends and family dealing with massive stresses on the home/job front. That includes my daughters who are juggling time-consuming and soul sucking remote work, as well as a baby (Older) and a move(Younger). As the saying goes, I don't have to decide between which balls are glass or plastic because I'm not juggling any balls in the air at all!

Oddity #1: My cat has a much nicer manicure than I do! Now with the nail caps on, she can't scratch me or damage my furniture...or not as much anyway. 

Oddity #2: I was planning to wear this memento shirt of our February 2019 "snowmaggedon," then started feeling superstitious. It is 2020 after all. We've never gotten snow in October around here, and rarely in November, but I didn't want to risk it. :)

Oddity #3: There are some crazy eccentric neighbors in my area; I see this elaborate display nearly every day on my walk to my parents. They must have a storage unit or garage full of decorations. My few fall decorations are looking mighty pathetic. 

The pipe organ up there is a nice touch. Do vampires play the organ?

My neighbor Chuck is a retired teacher, and a walker, so we often chat from opposite sides of the street. He used to have a huge plastic cow head on the side of his house. This is his brand new piece of art(?) and I would love to ask him about it. I have trouble with my face sometimes though, as in I would definitely telegraph my opinion of said display!

Oddity #4: Due to heavy construction on my normal road, I took a different walking route where I found large mushrooms, and...

a rather strange sign on the side of the public street. This area is heavily wooded, so there are probably some nefarious activities going on in the vicinity. However, I really don't think the restriction is enforceable, do you? 

Oddity #5: Every time I go in and out of my house via the laundry room (nearly always), I walk by this artwork by my older daughter. It was an award winning painting of her looking into a cracked mirror, with never ending faceless versions of herself behind her, which we called the "Michael Jacksons." :)  She named it "Conformity"  although I interpret it more as how many different versions of ourselves there are. Do we get to paint our own "faces" or do our life experiences do that for us? (or a combination of both?)  I'm assuming that not many people have a piece like this hanging in their garage? 

Oddity#6: No picture, but my gadget guy (John) decided that he needed to install cameras on his house like his neighbors. But after he had finished putting them in, he realized that his dryer no longer worked. He had drilled through the dryer wiring, and now has a rather complex project ahead of him. Although he can't dry any clothes at the moment, at least he can watch people walk their dogs by his house! ;) Luckily, John has a lively sense of the ridiculous, and didn't mind that I laughed quite a bit over his faux pas. And I also offered him dryer time and dinner at my house tomorrow. 

 

Délices

Today I'm focusing on the delights of my mundane existence, both culinary and otherwise. I've spent time with people outdoors, exercised enough that my legs were wobbly, and scheduled a car coffee date for tomorrow morning. I can't allow feeling alone and powerless(over so much) to define who I am! 

John and I joined his friends Paul and Kris for a 14 mile bike ride along the Green River. (of Green River Killer fame) We had wished for a nicer day, but it didn't rain at least. The clouds often threatened though, and a couple times the wind almost blew me off the bike. 

There were many fields of pumpkins because 'tis that time of year. I'm also seeing some crazily decorated houses, probably militant pro-Halloweenies. As far as they're concerned, NOTHING, not even a raging pandemic, will get in the way of this very important holiday. Sigh. 

John enjoys capturing a few secret pictures of me riding awkwardly, usually with my helmet askew. Since I resist using the power assist on the e-bike, he's nearly always ahead of me! :)

Afterward, we had leftover roast(with veggies), and green beans, as well as a small crescent roll, a lovely salad, and a Nanaimo bar for dessert. I really need to keep up my exercising, don't I?  (too much comfort food) My jaw nearly hit the floor when I asked John for horseradish and he said, "I didn't know you could eat roast with horseradish. I thought it was just for prime rib." Good grief! 

The fall colors are spectacular in New York from what I see in my daughter's pictures; however, I chose this photo of my grandson to share. If GQ has a baby edition, doesn't he belong on the cover? That sweater vest! His collared plaid shirt! Those huge brown eyes! His kissable cheeks! Delightful indeed. 

No post titled "Délices" could end any other way than with my newly received ballot, which I will fill out tonight, then turn in at my library's drop box. I don't think I've ever been as nervous or excited to vote as this year. 2020 has been unimaginable, but perhaps some good can come out of it after all? I'm hoping that the results bring us, if not delight, at least a return to sanity. 

Emoting

Feelings are not facts. I try to remind myself of that every day, especially during these pandemic times. It's true that my daughters live far away with their partners. My parents have each other, John's priorities are his daughters (one close by) and granddaughter, and most of my friends live with a significant other. It's easy to convince myself that I'm peripheral and unimportant, which I don't necessarily think is true, although it's sometimes the way I feel. Prior to the virus, I could mitigate my aloneness by socializing with many friends on coffee dates, Happy Hours, group get togethers and trips. I call myself an outgoing introvert, but perhaps I'm more of an extrovert than I thought? However I label myself, this lifestyle isn't comfortable for me, and that IS a fact. 

I made my Nanaimo bars though! I'll certainly never make it on any Great Baking Show; as you can see, my presentation was lousy, and I couldn't find custard powder, so I used vanilla pudding powder. They are tasty, but contain over 1 pound of butter, as well as lots of sugar and chocolate. Healthy? NOT! Sadly I'm now finished with the three seasons of the Great Canadian Baking Show; the Canadians are so nice. I was intending to start the Great Irish Baking Show, but can't find Season 1, Episode 1 anywhere. Thus, I tried the Great Australian Bake Off where the contestants are weird, the music is atrocious, and the female judge is as mean as a snake. Perhaps even meaner. 

On my neighborhood walk, I found pleasure in a bit of fall color and the vibrant blue sky. I also had a deep think about this quote:

"Water does not resist. Water flows. When you plunge your hand into it, all you feel is a caress. Water is not a solid wall, it will not stop you. But water always goes where it wants to go, and nothing in the end can stand against it. Water is patient. Dripping water wears away a stone. Remember that... Remember you are half water. If you can't go through an obstacle, go around it. Water does."

- Margaret Atwood (The Penelopiad)

 

Wisdom and encouragement from a fellow Margaret! :)

 

On this day

Today was much nicer, although that mainly related to the weather and not to any particular events or to my mood. In fact, I've had to work hard at seeing anything worthwhile in this day. 

The love of a cat is transitory and conditional. When this scratch was actively bleeding, I had to wrap toilet paper around it since it was too big for a bandaid. Oh, Mari. 

The space inside and outside my house isn't necessarily positive. It somehow makes me feel even more alone. I was definitely lonely and uninspired today. 

My neighbor across the street(yes, he copied the look of my house) doesn't have anywhere near as much parking area alongside his place. Ironically, he needs it with his multitude of cars, whereas I no longer do. What I wouldn't give to have my kids' cars in the driveway though!

I was happy to find some colorful plants along my walk. The brightness cheered me up a bit. John and I were supposed to have dinner tomorrow before a bike ride on Friday. But then he spontaneously invited his daughter and granddaughter, both of whom have colds. His daughter works and his granddaughter goes to daycare. We would be inside and eating. So, I had to tactfully tell him that I wouldn't be coming after all. He's also decided to drive his camper down to Texas at Thanksgiving to visit his other daughter and her family. I'm both glad and sad that he's taking the trip. I will miss him. I have no idea what my plans are for that holiday, and I may spend it alone. Unfortunately, my brother and his gang are virus deniers whom I don't trust with my health. However, my elderly parents won't want to make a fuss, thus they'll probably celebrate there if invited. May I just reiterate...THIS REALLY SUCKS.

In a day of few accomplishments and too much self-pity, I got my back lawn mowed at least. My grass thrives in the rains and cooler temperatures of fall. Remember how awful it looked in August? 

Printing out the recipe for Nanaimo bars is the first step toward making them! I'll brave a quick trip to the grocery store tomorrow, then see how I do in the kitchen. There probably won't be much resemblance to the Great Canadian Baking show, eh? :)

 

 

Waiting on the weather

It's fortunate that I'm not an early exerciser because, in addition to the pouring rain and heavy wind, we also had house shaking thunder this morning. Although I'm a devoted walker/runner, I draw the line at strong wind since my route is tree lined, like most of Washington State.:) It was an excellent excuse to stay in bed, and then hang out with the cat in the recliner for several hours a while. Finally, there was a lull in the weather insanity, thus I geared up and got out! 

Here is part of where I walk. That large branch would not have felt good landing on on my head! Should I invest in a hard hat? 

That isn't a bush behind me; it's the part of the tree that came down. The wind continues to gust, trees are still falling in some areas, and many are out of power. (including John) Welcome to fall! ;)

As you can see, the weather hasn't decided yet what it wants to do. Probably many things! 

In spite of all the craziness and stress of 2020, my darling Little Guy is a day brightener. He's doing so much now: rolling around, laughing infectiously with his whole face, chewing on all his toys, and sparkling with joy. I love this sweet boy!