What We Carry

“I don't want to have these burdens. But I can't bear to turn them over to anyone else, either. Because, despite all the work, I like being in control of my own life.”
― Robin Hobb, Ship of Destiny

It took me a long time to realize that we're all carrying burdens and worries of some sort; there are simply people who hide it better than others. I'm not one of those. Yet it's comforting that we're in this sinking ship together although our issues vary between financial issues, loneliness, physical problems, emotional/mental distress, stress over loved ones (and decisions they make or don't make), or a combination of the aforementioned. Right now, I'm dealing with something potentially major that no one can help me with. Sometimes others can relieve some of the burden but this time I will need to carry it alone. Of course, my blog friends know that if this had to do with me, I would write about it here; since it doesn't, I'll just mention that I might be absent for a time. I'll need to process some sh*t things. Or I'll post cat photos and blog about nothings like I usually do. But I have to be honest that all is not sweetness and light chez moi. It probably isn't anywhere, is it? Have I ever mentioned that I absolutely hate drama? I'm a boring person. 

Yesterday I got to spend time with both grandsons (and my daughter and son-in-law) plus this sadly neglected cat. (he thinks) He found my lap and parked himself there! Littlest Guy is so smiley now, but wow, does he spit up a lot. Every clean sweatshirt I wear to their house is soon anointed. I don't mind.

My own girl is great company, except when she steals my recliner. Since I live alone, it's comforting to have a pet. She really does love me in her own feline way. :)

At least there is currently no talk of the S word and I see some sunny days among the chilly winter temperatures. I'll have to drag my turtlenecks back out though because I intend to keep walking whenever I possibly can. My mental and emotional health require it. Sigh. 

Comments

[Deb]

I am glad we are having coffee tomorrow...

[Mary]

Eww! I had not seen that forecast. Wish I hadn't. I'm so sorry you're going through tough times. Sending love.

[JC]

Take your time and do what you have to do.
We do have snow, I do not like it at all.

I hate drama also but it's out there.

[Kathy]

That sounds very mysterious. I hope you will be okay. Yes, everyone is going through something. Ever since I came back from my sister's, I have been focused on getting both my literal and figurative houses in order. I saw how fast things can happen. Finally getting the upstairs bathroom done in March, no time like the present... (Also, I have no interest in going to the studio and making stuff, too focused on doing house and paperwork right now)

[Pixie]

Do what you need to do. I'm not a fan of drama either and have decided to put a stop to it. Of course, I say that now, who knows what tomorrow will bring? Take care sweetie, sending hugs.

[Maureen]

Yes, the burdens we carry can seem so heavy some days. Today I decided to seek out therapy because emotionally supporting both my mother and daughter are taking such a toll on me. Seeking out help is never easy for me, but sometimes it's necessary. I hope you work through your 'things' in whatever way is best for you. Sending strengthening energy.

[DrumMajor Linda in Kansas]

Hope you can travel through your dilemma. Be sure and lean on friends and others, even if it's just a cat. Many other are fighting some kind of battle too. Trying sewing a burp cloth to your shirts. Linda in Kansas

[Luftmentsch]

I'm sorry to read this. You can email me if you want to talk, even without saying what's going on. Enjoy your grandsons and cats!

[Ed]

I hate drama, especially the family kind. You have my sympathies.

[Doug M]

Margaret, sure was sorry to read this. I hope things are resolved soon, please don't disappear. BIf you need a friend, I'm here.

[AC]

The struggle for the recliner goes on and on here.

Sorry about your latest upset. I trust you shall carry your burden well and to a good outcome. Shall I say thoughts and prayers? No, I shan’t. Not prayers at least. Nobody every means that anyway.

[Robin]

Hi Margaret, sorry to read you are going through a hard time now. Cuddle up with the cats and grandkids, that will help.
Know that we all are thinking of you.❤️❤️

[sillygirl]

Just post photos of kitties while you go through this and we will know when you show other things that some troubles have passed. I'm not a trauma-lover either. Boring is good.

[Susan]

I'm sorry to hear you are experiencing a troublesome time. Hopefully, things will resolve sooner rather than later. When it comes to family issues, I've decided I can be supportive but not take on the problem and potentially be an enabler. I've also given my speech about "your life, your choices" a few times. Tough love is hard and I refuse to be an enabler. O's smiles sound wonderful, smiling happy babies are the best. I remember the baby snuggle/spit up days and swapping out tops on demand. Mari and Ziggy are looking good. They are sweet love bugs that want their creature comforts.

[Ally Bean]

My aunt used to caution that it's not the problem itself that is the problem, it's how you handle the problem that is the problem. I thought she was a bit daft when I was younger, but now know otherwise.

[Matt]

Sorry to hear this, Margaret. Hope it all works out and we are here if you need to vent. Take care and be kind to yourself. And enjoy that sunshine.

[Bruce]

You have a passel of friends here on the Internet. Know that we will be offering whatever aid we can provide as you get through the troubles.

[Pam Donaldson]

Oh dear, sorry to hear this. Hope it all turns out ok in the end. Life, eh? xx

[Joanne Noragon]

Best wishes on the current dilemma voyage. Come out the other side in sunshine.

[StoicWannabe]

I was afraid that your silence meant something was brewing there. Gentle hugs from afar. Yes, we all have our burdens and share them in a variety of ways and sometimes need to incubate and deal with them alone for a while. Please reach out if you need to. 💗

[J]

I’m sorry there are burdens for you right now. I know we all have them, but there are definitely times that are easier than others in our lives. I hope that your life gets easier soon, in all good ways.

[Kaye]

Having aging parents is hard. It makes us face our mortality as well as theirs, as well as the difficult decisions and transitions that are required.

"Adult" children also come with another set of challenges (I have found).

Keep walking and doing things for yourself. Love those babies. The grand babies always seem less complicated. Yay!

[Zazzy]

I've been thinking about this a lot lately. I think I'm concluding that isolating is not the answer, but knowing that other are dealing with their own problems and crises -- I don't want to sing them a dirge, you know? Please call or text if you want, or don't if that's what you need. I am still thinking of you and hoping that things are well-ish.

I don't remember where I picked this up, it may even have been from you. It's my quote of the month:

“I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.”
~Frank Herbert, Dune

[Steve]

I'm sorry to hear you're going through a rough patch. We all have them. You're right to get out and stay active as much as possible. I'm happy to see cat photos -- if that's what you have to offer, there's nothing wrong with that. :)

[Wendy]

Oh dear. I finally get back to my few blogs and see you are having some "trouble" in your life. I hope it resolves soon for you.
I really wish I could have my kitty in the house with me, but I have a daughter and a grandson who is allergic to cats so they stay outside and live in my garage, although I found poop on the garage floor while the cat litter box was right there. They may get kicked out...haha.
I like the looks of your temperatures. Today we are in a wind chill and cold temp warning. 35- 45 below. Highs of -6 today. BUT...It's February and that always makes me happy that spring is now just around the corner. Wendy